the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
