yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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