I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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