you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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