i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
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