Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
