she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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