He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
