You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Found your dick twin last night
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
He? As in you personified your dick?
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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