can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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