4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize
