I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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