I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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