Will you blow on my dice?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
