in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
