Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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