Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
