Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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