No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
