Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
