summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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