Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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