There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
