you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize
