Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
