none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
