you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
