Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
