I hope mine doesn't look like that
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
He shit in the fireplace
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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