are you so shy because you have an std?
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
