How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i already hear my dad disowning me
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
And then he peed in my hair
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