Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize
