Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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