it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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