Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Houston, we have a squirter
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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