me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
