Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
