i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
