I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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