that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
