she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
