"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Randomize