We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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