I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Randomize
