wat bout pragnant strippers??
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize
