The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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