You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
