I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
