forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
