I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
