my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
